Goodbye, Spencer
by Chezza456
Summary: An alternative ending to S3E16 where Toby is in his apartment rather than Mona. Contains dark themes, so rated M for safety. Oneshot.


**Just something that I was really worried would happen while watching this ep. As I said, it contains dark themes, so be warned.**

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"Toby... please let me in." Spencer sobbed helplessly against the door. She couldn't understand why he had done this to them – to her – and she didn't want to believe that he was working for A. There had to be some other reason, something legitimate that would make sense and prove he was actually innocent. But she wasn't going to find that out, stuck on this side of the door. Pounding her fists against the wood she sobbed heavily, trying to build up the strength to call out again. The lights in his apartment were on, and music was playing softly in the kitchen. He was in, but he wasn't answering.  
"Toby please!" Spencer begged. "I need to talk to you, I need to know _why_." She choked on her sobs and sniffed, listening for any sound of movement behind the door. Nothing. Her throat burned and her eyes stung as she continued to sit in the doorway in tears. She had vowed to herself that she wasn't leaving until she got answers. And if that meant she was waiting all night then so be it. With a sudden surge of anger she pounded fiercely against the door again. Once more, there was no answer and Spencer cradled her throbbing hands distraught. The spare key lay by her foot and in frustration she kicked it off the stairway. Why had he changed his locks? When had he even had time to do it? Fresh tears fell as she realised that he obviously had something to hide from her. It was a hopeless attempt. He was working with Mona to be A, he always had been, he'd just been scamming her for the past year. That was why he wouldn't talk to her now. If he was innocent then he'd prove it to her. She was sure of that. Slowly she pulled herself up using the doorframe until she was back onto her feet. He'd played her, just how Mona had done with Hanna. How did she not see this coming? _He was Toby Cavanaugh_. He was the one that took the blame for the Jenna thing; of course he wasn't on their side.

As more sobs wracked her body she pushed herself away from his door and towards the steps down to her car. Tears blurred her vision and she decided that she wasn't in a fit state to drive right now. She fumbled in her coat pocket for her phone yet cursed, drawing her hand out quickly as she hit something sharp. Wiping her eyes and nose carelessly with her sleeve, she then reached back into her pocket carefully to retrieve the item that had stabbed her. It was a discarded hairpin that she'd obviously left in there from some previous occasion. She dangled her hand over the rail, ready to reject it as she had with the spare key, until a thought came into her head. Turning back to look at the door, Spencer contemplated breaking in and forcing Toby to speak to her. At least she would get some answers that way. No, _screw him_ , she didn't want to hear his excuses. She turned back and descended down the stairs to her car. But maybe she could find out something else about what Toby and Mona were doing together... maybe she could find something to stop A altogether. Spencer's head was spinning and she was unsure about what to do. After minutes of debating with herself she grabbed her phone and rung Aria. She normally gave good advice, and that was what Spencer really needed right now. The call dialled for several moments before Aria's voice spoke at the other end. However it was her voicemail. Spencer sighed and hung up. She considered ringing Hanna or Emily, however finally decided against it as she twirled the hairpin through her fingers. She couldn't really have this conversation about Toby's betrayal over the phone.

After several more long minutes of debating with herself she eventually crept back up the steps to Toby's front door. Taking a couple of breaths to steady her nerves, she slid the hairpin into the keyhole and twisted it, working the lock until it clicked. With a sigh of relief Spencer slipped inside. The first thing she noticed was how everything was still set up, exactly how she'd left it when she'd hurried home after finding his fake badge. The table was still pristine, the wine unopened and her gifts still on the sideboard. With a sudden spurt of rage she strolled over them, ready to knock the stupid Scrabble board to the floor until she noticed that her card was missing. It was the only thing; everything else had been left untouched. Surprised and confused, Spencer glanced into the bedroom, finding it to be empty also. She had assumed Toby had been in... maybe he'd upped and left already? Feeling agitated she decided to leave, not wanting to be in his apartment any longer. As she exited the bedroom she felt her shoes squelch on the floor. Looking down she noticed a puddle of water had collected in the hallway. She quickly glanced up but it was soon apparent that the ceiling was free of leaks. Curiously she followed the water across the floor until she traced it back up to the bathroom. Through the crack under the door water was slowly trickling out. Her anger quickly fell away as she realised why the bathroom would be leaking. And it wasn't the newly installed plumbing. Spencer tried the door handle. It was locked. Frantically she pushed against the door, her eyes widening in fear.  
"Toby?" She called out worriedly. The door still didn't budge and she desperately began to pound at it. "Toby!" After a moment of struggling she took a step back and launched a hard kick at the middle of the door. Another attempt and the door finally gave way and flung open. Spencer rushed inside.

She wasn't prepared for what she saw. As the damn stopping the inches of water flooding the tiled floor from washing out into the hallway was opened, the liquid spilled out, coating the pale carpet in a glistening red. Streaks of the morbid colour stained the sides of the new bathtub as it the water overflowed and dragged the thicker substance with it. Spencer was struck by the sight of how much blood was spilling onto the floor. She felt lightheaded and about to faint, but at the same time her stomach was lurching furiously and her feet were cemented to the ground. Toby's body was slumped in the tub, his butchered wrists hanging over the edge. The bloody razor blade was bobbing up and down in the water under the taps that were still running. It was an awful sight, and Spencer wanted to turn and run. But she couldn't do anything other than stare in horror. She couldn't even move her lips to make a sound. Toby was dead, and she couldn't do anything but stare.

Out of the corner of her eye she spotted something on the lid of the toilet seat and managed to tear her eyes away from his body long enough to focus on it. It was the thing that finally reduced her to a sobbing wreck as she sunk down against the wall. Her anniversary card stood there, displayed, facing the bathtub. There was something else underneath it, an envelope with Spencer's name scrawled on it in his handwriting. Slowly she reached out her shaking hand to grab it. Being careful not to drop it into the flooded water that she was sat in, she ripped it open. Her eyes blurred as the tears continued to well up and she hurriedly wiped her face with her sleeve. Fumbling with the envelope, she managed to pull out the card inside it. It was his anniversary card to her. Holding back her sobs and trying desperately to steady her shaking hands, Spencer slowly opened the card to read it.

 _I'm so sorry Spencer. I know I've completely betrayed you, but I want you to know that I was doing this to try and protect you. I know you'll never forgive me, and I don't deserve it after what I've done, but I love you Spencer. I love you so much, and I can't live knowing that I've hurt you like this.  
Goodbye, Spencer_.

She let her head fall back against the wall as her body convulsed. Her sobbing was uncontrollable as everything dawned on her. Toby was scared that she'd hate him. So he committed suicide. That was more than enough proof to convince her that he was innocent of A's gang, but it was too late. She had forgiven him, but he was already dead.


End file.
